Feels like its already been ages since A gone from ‘our’ meeting place. Haha. Its funny rite? I know its not ‘our’ meeting place but there was the place where I 1st and last met A. can anyone understand me how does it feel when u know the person that you like, love or have crush on will never be yours? Please tell me how does it feel?? It is hurt to accept the fact rite? When he was there, I am terribly happy. Hahaha. Yea I admit it. I’m happy when he was around. Eventhough you could only see him from far, but yet that made me feel great. But, now and forever he is gone. Doesn’t mean he is dead or get shot but he is ‘gone’. Disappear. Vanished from my eyes. If A came across my mind, I will open up the laptop. Yes! A is in my lappie or through facebook. Once he uploaded new pictures, I will go through those pictures and see how he is now. He looked great since he is gone. Pretty much happier than before I guess because he is surrounded by his F now. 24 7.maybe. I didn’t have the intention to take something that is not mine but is it a crime to have some sort of feelings towards A? me myself can’t describe what the hell am I feeling.is it love? No. I don’t think so. People always say that, if you fell in love, your heart beats faster than ever, you feel awkward when you see the person you like or you love or the person you have crushed on. I don’t feel that. I just want to see him. That is pretty enough for me.
Sometimes, when you are no longer able to control your emotions, you will burst into tears. Everyone feels that way. When you are down, what would you do? Just throw a fake smile? Pretending ‘I’m ok la friends. Don’t worry. Myb it is because of the period’. That is cliché. By now, I understand the word cliché. Hahaha. Aahhh. What am I writing this shit? No one will know how I feel. Even ur super duper BFFFF say ‘ I know how u feel. I’ve gone through this before. Just be patience. Everything will be fine. There are bugs out there.’ What bugs? For me, it is only a bug. That is A! wth!! It is all your fault! Why must I saw u in everywhere I go? Why must I saw ur yea-his-butt’s-heavy everywhere when u was there?? WHY?? Provide me the answers please. Could anyone? When my itunes shuffles and when it’s turn to always be my baby, it reminds me of u. u were singing happily rite? I remember that. Hahaha. So cute of u when u were on the pitch. If I had times or if there were any games that u played, i wanted to see u. even I don’t have the urge, but I tried and finally I got there where u were playing. Omg. I miss damn much that moments!
A!! I miss you so much. Hoping you will achieve what you strive for and lived happily ever after with F. =’(